Ken Clarke

Okay so Mandelson and co couldn’t negotiate their way into a paper bag. If it weren’t so sad, it would be laughable. And now we have Lord Chancellor Clarke in charge of Justice! Time to resurrect a New Statesman poem from 1994 –


Moon Drivel

Unemployment ‘fell’ to 2,661,000. “Low expenditure is the key to lower taxes,” said Kenneth Clarke. Henry Mancini died.

Moon drivel

Bluer than a bird

That’s messing on the Third Estate:

Oh lawmaker,

You windbreaker,

Whatever you’re saying

Is way past its date.

You’re daft as a lavaTory brush

(You’re bound to get the brush-off,see):

You’re making the same painful sound

As muzak all around

Or Huckleberry Hound…

Moon drivel! Stuff me.

Moon drivel, chasing after votes,

There’s such a lot of votes you’ve cost.

You’re bound for one fatal poll

To drop you in the hole,

Hushpuppies on the dole.

Moon drivel, get lost.


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